← Quranic WisdomQuranic Wisdom
Between Rational Choice and Emotional Choice
English · 2 min read
Life is a game of choices. Every moment you have to opt for some choice, either on a rational level or on an emotional level. The rational choice always leads to success, while the emotional choice leads to problems, if not total failure. Opting for the rational choice endows one with peace of mind, while the emotional choice is bound to give rise to second thoughts later in life.
This is due to the law of nature. The law of nature is based on realities, it is not based on anyone’s emotions. When a person goes through a situation and takes decision on a rational basis, he instantly receives the support of the law of nature. However, if a person decides on the basis of his emotions, he does not get the support of the law of nature. It is this difference that creates problems. This law of nature is mentioned in the Quran in these words:
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You may dislike something although it is good for you, or like something although it is bad for you: God knows but you do not. (2:216)
Qur'anQuotes the Qur'an
The Quran also applies this principle to the issue of marriage. There is a very relevant verse in the Quran in this regard:
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If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike something which God might make a source of abundant good. (4:19)
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The experience of marriage comes to every man and woman. There is no escape from this experience. It means that at the time of marriage, everyone faces the moment of either making a rational choice or an emotional choice. Marriage leads to lifetime companionship. Therefore, it is necessary for both partners to be very serious in this matter. They must take into consideration the long-term benefits, rather than short-term gains. Both should make a rational decision and not an emotional decision.
There is, however, a problem. The time for marriage always comes when both partners are in their age of immaturity and have little experience of real life. At this stage, they are not in a position to take a decision on purely objective basis.
Then what should be done? The Quran gives a very practical criterion for making a decision in this matter. One who keeps in mind this practical criterion will ensure that his or her married life is a success. Those who fail to follow this criterion take the risk of turning their marriage into a problem marriage.
The Quranic criterion in this regard is: Don’t follow your desires, follow your reason. Those who are governed by their desire only see the appearance, or take things at face-value. But, being governed by reason makes one reach the depth of the matter. Reason follows reality and decides by seeing the future rather than the present. Due to this difference, an emotional judgement creates problems, while a rational judgement always leads to success.
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